A Little Bummed

We're all feeling a bit bummed at our house. Had some stuff happen that, for me anyways, left me feeling disappointed, a little bitter and questioning why things are the way they are. On top of that, we've got lots of friends leaving - we have 3 going away parties this weekend alone. Some are leaving for just a time, others permanently. One family is moving to another continent and another just down the street. Hubs is having a good boss leave for a job opportunity in another state (which adds to his stress because now he's in charge temporarily). J is losing 2 friends she greatly enjoyed playing with. We're so busy right now, we aren't able to spend the time we'd like to with these folks before they leave.

Both of us are dealing with a flood of emotions but are unsure what to do with them. Processing isn't an easy thing sometimes. I told K that in addition to being sad, I feel guilty about feeling bad. None of these things are directly happening to us (you know,we're not moving, our family member isn't leaving, etc) so it seems that feeling this way is making it all about me when it isn't about me at all. I guess feelings are just feelings and aren't right or wrong by nature.

Anyways, if you talk with us and we're in a funk, this is why.

Freely Given

Yesterday, a woman flagged me down as I was leaving the Publix shopping center. She looked frantic and said she'd fled her home and abusive husband in a hurry and had left her purse behind. Did I have some change with which she could buy some gas? I told her if she'd drive down to the service station, I'd buy her a tank of gas. She quickly accepted and drove on. As she pumped gas into her car, she kept saying "I have a job, I have money" and thanked me for helping her. I assured her that I was happy to help her. I explained that it wasn't my money but I was just a steward of the money God gave us and that this was how I could show her the love of Jesus. She wouldn't let me fill her tank to the top, but thanked me and drove away with a wave. It was a wonderful opportunity to show Jadyn how to extend kindness to strangers as Jesus would have us do.

Today, I see a Twitter post by a friend who also lives in my area that she, too, helped someone yesterday only to find out she'd been duped. Immediately I thought of my own scenario and wondered if I'd been scammed by the same person.

I've been scammed in the past and it really made me angry. I vowed it would never happen again. If I determined that they deserved my help, then I'd give it.....WHAT?!

My anger was based out of pride. I'd been duped. I looked stupid. My money was wasted. Me, myself, I. I certainly hadn't given with a cheerful heart and my conditional help didn't honor Jesus in any way.

This time, I'm not angry. I don't even know if this lady's claim was legitimate or not. It doesn't matter. I'm responsible for myself and my actions, not hers. I was able to give her a hug, tell her that Jesus loved her and pray for her as I drove home. My daughter got to see how we obey Jesus and love others in a practical way. My position is not as judge to determine if that woman was "worthy" of my gift. God knows her heart and will deal with her in love the way she needs it. It's His money, so if was stolen, He'll see that it's returned.

I'm thankful that God loves me unconditionally and didn't wait until I deserved His gift before He gave it. The gift was not dependent on a change of heart, but rather was what caused it.

Praise in the Storm - Literally

Just wanted to say, "Thank you, Jesus" for saving my extended family from harm yesterday in the M'boro tornado. They pretty much lost everything, but my niece, nephew and his girlfriend were not harmed when it hit the house.

BzzAgent Report - Chili's Guiltless Grill Entrees

My friend got me interested in this great word-of-mouth marketing program called BzzAgent. I get to try out great new products and then tell my friends about it. I'm pretty quick to give my opinion on things, so this was the thing for me!

As a BzzAgent, I was given the opportunity to try out Chili's new Guiltless Grill entrees. These are Chili's 6 new menu items that have less than 750 calories, 25 grams of fat and 8 grams of saturated fat.

Our family went out for a multi-birthday celebration and I used my free entree coupon to get the Guiltless Cedar Plank Tilapia. It was a perfect portion size of fish and came with a side of broccoli seasoned with carrot curls and parmesan cheese. Unfortunately, my fish was cold, but I think this was a restaurant-specific problem rather than a problem with the entree itself. The fish came garnished with pico de gallo which added some great flavor. The broccoli was steamed just right and retained some good crunchiness.

Overall, it was a great entree for those wishing to watch what they eat. It was a healthy meal, but not very filling. If it had been all I'd had that meal, I would have been hungry afterwards. The four of us split an order of chips and salsa preceding the meal and ended the meal with a dessert split 3 ways. After all that, I was just barely full (those that know me can attest that I don't typically pack away a bunch of food in a single sitting). I guess the chips and dessert negated the benefit of that "less than 750 calorie and 25g of fat" meal!

Perhaps they could increase the size of the veggie side. Another option would be to add a side salad with a light dressing. This would increase the volume of the meal without adding too many more calories or fat. As far as the price, I would consider it too high for the amount of food I received.

I would give the entree a 9 of 10 for taste (assuming it would be hot the next time), a 7 of 10 for portion size (needs more veggies), and a 6 of 10 for price. I would certainly order off the Guiltless Grill menu again but would opt for a less expensive item.

The Love of Jesus and Football

I heard this story read in its entirety on the radio this morning and I just had to share it with as many people as I could. Tears flowed as I listened to this tale of how some high school kids and their coaches and parents lavishly showed the love of Jesus to a group of kids most would have shunned.

My desperate prayer is that God would help me love people just a fraction of how He does. My nose is in my navel far too often and I fail to see the people around me. If I do see them, I tend to see them through the lens of what they can do for me or why they're in my way. Brandon Heath's song, Give Me Your Eyes, fleshes out my heart's prayer. The chorus says, "Give me Your eyes for just one second, Give me your eyes so I can see, Everything that I've been missing, Give me your love for humanity."

I went to a Beth Moore conference several years ago and one thing has stayed with me ever since. She spoke of when Jesus healed the blind man in Mark 8:22. When Jesus touched the man's eyes the first time, He asked him what he saw and the man replied, "I see men like trees walking around." Jesus touched his eyes a second time and then the man saw everything clearly. His healing was not complete until he saw people clearly. If I just see people as "trees walking" and not as individuals, I'm not completely free of my blindness. Having my eyes completely opened means seeing people through the lens of Jesus' love.

The kids, parents and coaches in that story didn't see the other team as just a bunch of thugs they had to play one night. They saw them as hurting souls in need of the love of Jesus. They then put their faith into action in a simple, practical but powerful way. It was so easy to do, yet so incredibly "forever."

I want to be able to do that. My prayer, then, is the cry of blind Bartimaeus who said, "I want to regain my sight!" I don't want to see people as trees, objects, obstacles. I want to quit being blinded by my self and see people like Jesus does.